A SPECIAL
WEDDING BLESSING
MIKE
CUNNINGHAM
AUGUST 15,
2010
Good afternoon everyone.
On behalf of Jerry and Sarah I’m honored to welcome you to this very special
occasion. For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Mike Cunningham and
I’m the pastor of this little church. I’m also Sarah’s Grandpa and I have to
admit then when Sarah first introduced me to Jerry I never thought we would be
gathered here today. The first thing I noticed was that there’s quite a
difference in their ages. I knew Sarah was a bright young woman and I thought
that with the passing of time she would decide that Jerry wasn’t the man for
her. As you can see, I was mistaken.
I assure you I wouldn’t
be here unless I was convinced of certain things about this couple. However, before
I explain allow me to share a little bit from the greatest true story the world
has ever known. Here goes: Once upon a time there was no such thing as time. It
didn’t exist. There was just an eternal state in which there is no beginning or
ending. In it lives a supernatural Being the Bible identifies as God. Christians
believe the Bible is our Creator’s written revelation of Himself to His human
creatures such as you and me. Among the astonishing information within its
pages is the fact that on the sixth day of the creation process God brought the
first man into existence. Next we read about our Creator saying
Genesis
2:18,24 18 "It is not good
that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him."
After He created (the first woman) God said: 24 Therefore
a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they
shall become one flesh.’
What is about to take
place in a few minutes is something that’s very special to Sarah and Jerry, and
I assure you it is to me, too. We’re going to witness the uniting of these two
people in marriage, which the Bible defines as being a permanent relationship
joining together one man and one woman each of whom promise to be totally
committed to the other as lifetime companions. As I mentioned a moment ago, it
was instituted at the beginning of time by our Creator, and is a commitment
Sarah and Jerry are about to make to each other in our presence, but more
importantly, in the presence of God.
God lived amongst that
first man and woman. He united them in
marriage and they enjoyed an unimaginably happy relationship of being in total harmony
with Him and each other. The man and woman was oblivious of the meaning of
words such as fear, anxiety, dishonesty, worry, depression, pride, impatience,
jealousy, greed, and envy, nor did they know what it was like to become sick or
die. Needless to say, they were very happy, and all because they lived their
lives in a manner which was centered on God. In other words, God was number one.
In the course of time however, they became discontented and wanted more. They
wanted to be like God and do their own thing. And, God in His infinite wisdom
and perfect love allowed them to give it a try, which is something all human
beings have been doing ever since. From that moment forward everything changed
within the man and woman which had a profound effect on them and each of their
offspring including you and me. This is God’s explanation of the reason we
human beings are by our very nature very flawed. If we are honest with
ourselves we must admit that every one of us have many shortcomings, some more
than others, and none of us are presently the kind of creature God created
human beings to be. Unless that wonderful relationship with our Creator is
restored, our world is going to continue its downward spiral propelled by
self-centered people. But thankfully our all-loving God intervened, and so, at
a specific moment in time, our invisible Creator clothed Himself with flesh and
entered our world in the Person of His Son, Jesus Christ.
With
incomprehensible love, God the Son had become a human creature with the name of
Jesus and lived in our world amongst human beings. The Creator had become a
human being just like us with one exception. He lived a life which was perfectly
God-centered. Needless to say, Jesus was like a light shining in the darkness
in our messed up world and he caught everyone’s attention, especially the
religious leaders of the time who believed they had a corner on all spiritual truth
and were better than everyone else, nor practice what they preached. They
seized every opportunity to put Jesus on the spot
such as the time they questioned Him concerning the permanence of marriage. We
read His reply in Matthew’s Gospel when He referenced the passages I quoted a
moment ago about God instituting marriage. Jesus said:
4...“Have you never read that He Who made them from the
beginning made them male and female, 5 And said, For this reason a man shall leave his father and
mother and shall be united firmly (joined inseparably) to his wife, and the two
shall become one flesh? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together
let not man put asunder (separate).” Matthew 19:4-6 (AMP)
At this point in the
ceremony I hope you’ve been wondering what those things are that convinced me I
should marry Jerry to my granddaughter Sarah. After all, by his own admission,
Jerry doesn’t have a very good track record in his relationships with women and
that’s putting it mildly. I love Sarah dearly and wouldn’t want to see her make
a mistake she would live to regret much less me play a part in it. However, Sarah
and Jerry have convinced me that, with God’s help, they promise to love one
another until He separates them by death. As imperfect as it no doubt is, I’m also
convinced each of them understands the true meaning of love. It was easy for me
to determine this with Sarah. After all I’ve know her ever since she came into
my life in the midst of a howling nor’easter twenty some odd years ago. I have
seen her put true love into practice on numerous occasions including during the
pre-marital counseling sessions.
Although I haven’t known
Jerry very long, I also saw displays of his love, especially as it pertains to
being respectful and patient with me. Through Sarah and others I had heard of
Jerry’s love for other people. What clinched it for me with him however was the
time I purposely asked Jerry a question which was based on my experience a
number of years ago with a young 15 year old boy I’ll call Danny. Danny’s
parents had separated and he was living with his mother and brother and sister.
His parents split and his father moved in with a woman and her five children
and made a new life for himself. Unfortunately, as far his children were concerned,
that life didn’t include them. Unless we’ve been in those children’s shoes we
can only imagine the terrible impact the man’s rejection of them had on their
emotions and self-image.
I do know those kids
felt awful because they loved their father dearly, but unless he had to, or was
pressured in some way, the man had nothing to do with them. Danny ran away from
home and was living near a sand pit close to ours. Sarah’s mom was a teenager at the time and so were
her brother and two sisters. Although Sarah’s grandma and I were struggling to
raise our own family and barely had enough money to pay the bills, we took
Danny into our home, and loved that boy just as if he was one of our own
children. Danny’s father never called him or us to find out how he was doing.
Never! In Danny’s eyes his father was contemptuously treating him as though he
didn’t exist.
Jerry just sat there taking
it all in and shaking his head from side to side in obvious disgust. It was
almost as though he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Then I asked him what
he would have done if he was Danny’s father? Would he stay in close touch with
his children and do everything possible to be part of their lives and
demonstrate his love for them, or would he put them behind him and move on with
his new life. Judging from Jerry’s facial expression I could see that question was
a no brainer. Next I threw another one at him and asked: suppose the child
didn’t want anything to do with you Jerry because you had hurt him or her so
much. What would you do in such a situation?” Jerry assured me he would
continue loving his child up until the moment he died and would do everything
possible to restore their broken relationship. And I have no good reason to disbelieve
Jerry.
Jerry’s children are
with us today and each of them knows without a doubt that, as imperfect as it certainly
is, their father truly loves them. Danny’s father didn’t know the real meaning
of love. I feel sorry for that man because true love and true happiness are
inseparable, and unless he changes, Danny’s father will never personally
experience either. I’ve been hoping and praying that he stop hurting his
children and displeasing his Creator, and learns what love is, and puts it into
practice. Although I can’t even come close to knowing any ones heart including
my own, Sarah and Jerry has convinced me they sincerely intend to strive to
love one another until God separates them by death. They have also given me
lots if reason to believe they know the true meaning of Gods’ definition of
love. Sarah and Jerry so much want their marriage, not only to last, but, in
total dependence upon God for His help, to blossom and become vibrant and
flourish. And they have each already assured me they intend to do their best to
love one another the way God wants all human beings to. And I believe them!
I’ve had their wedding
vows framed. It’s my adaptation of a paraphrase of something one of my favorite
authors wrote concerning something the Apostle Paul said in a letter he sent to
those early Christians. Jerry and Sarah have promised to hang it in a
conspicuous place in their home to serve as a constant reminder of this
ceremony, and of the solemn vow’s they are about to agree to, especially during
those inevitable times when one or both of them aren’t behaving very loveable.
And now, Jerry and Sarah; if you wholeheartedly agree with what I’m saying
please answer in the affirmative.
With God’s help,
I will be patient with
you, because I love you and I want to forgive you.
I will be kind to you,
because I love you and I want to help you.
I will not envy your
possessions or your gifts, because I love you and I want you to have the best.
I will not boast about
my attainments, because I love you and I want to hear about yours.
I will not be proud, because
I love you and I want to esteem you before myself.
I will not be rude,
because I love you and I care about your feelings.
At this point we’re
going to pause while I read something Sarah wrote and asked me to read today.
Here goes:
“The Apostle
Paul’s letter may contain a verse about love not being rude, but it is Jerry's
rudeness that attracted me to him! His rudeness is his willingness to always
tell the truth regardless of how others may react. His rudeness is him lovingly
telling me what he thinks I should do to solve a problem, not telling me I'm
doing everything right to be nice. He
always has reminded me "I never said I was nice,” and I can definitely
agree with that. He is "nice" through his brutal honestly and
unwavering ability to stand up for what he believes in, which many perceive as
rudeness. Rudeness in Paul’s letter refers to brutal honesty (or brutal opinion)
said to someone with a blatant disregard for their feelings. Jerry cares about
my feelings but, he's not about to be shy when it comes to helping me. That is
true love!” Now we’ll continue with the vows.
I will not be
self-seeking, because I love you and I want to meet your needs.
I will not be easily
angered by you, because I love you and I want to overlook your offenses.
I will not keep a record
of your wrongs, because I love you, and “love covers a multitude of sins.[i]
It’s sad but most folks
don’t have a clue as to what God’s definition of love is. I’m ashamed to say
that I certainly didn’t when I got married a little more than fifty one years ago
and it took me a long time before I finally learned, and I still haven’t got it
down pat. Now allow me to ask you folks the following question; “In your
wildest imagination; can any of you envision the marriage of this or any other
man and woman who, if they sincerely strive to love each other the way our
Creator directs; that such a marriage could possibly be anything other than
vibrant and continue to flourish?”
Groom: Jerry, will you
take your ring and place it upon the third finger of Sarah’s left hand, and
repeat after me this promise, saying: “With this ring I seal my promise, to be
your faithful and loving husband, as God is my witness.”
Bride: Sarah, will you
take your ring and place it upon the third finger of Jerry’s left hand, and
repeat after me this promise, saying: “With this ring, I seal my promise, to be
your faithful and loving wife, as God is my witness.”
Will those of you
witnesses who believe, that with God’s help, this marriage union will become
permanent, until God separates Sarah and Jerry by death, please stand.
By virtue of the
authority vested in me as a minister of the gospel of Christ, and in accordance
with the laws of God and the sovereign State of
Let’s all bow our heads:
Father, please shower down special blessings upon Jerry and Sarah and their
loved ones today, and all of their tomorrows and then throughout eternity.
Remind them to start each day asking You to strongly incline them to sincerely
want to love each other, just as You do them through your Son, and give each of
them the strength to overcome every temptation not to do so. And now, in the
name of Your Son, my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, I’m asking You to take
these words of my mouth and thoughts of my heart and turn them into ‘A SPECIAL WEDDING BLESSING,’ to everyone
present. Amen!
Ladies and gentlemen,
boys and girls, it’s my privilege to introduce Jerry and Sarah Williams.